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| From The Onion |
Regrets? I’ve Had a Few
By Matt Chrystal
2017 may be the first time in thirty nine years that I may have to admit that I was starting to "feel older." In 2017, I got prescription glasses so I could read the fine print. I went to the chiropractor once per week for herniated discs in my neck and back. I went to physical therapy for arthritis in my hip. I finally experienced a hangover lasting for more than a couple hours, and I even plucked a few more white hairs out of my beard.
But none of those things are what made me feel any older. That was all just normal maintenance to keep this party machine running. I started feeling "old" because, for the first time in my life, I skipped out on going to concerts that I really wanted to see and even went as far as to make up extremely lame excuses to justify my poor decisions.
Times done changed.
On a whim in 2000, I flew solo to Indianapolis and hitchhiked to Deer Creek Music Center to see a night of Bob Dylan with Phil Lesh & Friends, followed by three nights of Phish. I went simply because I was afraid to miss out on it. It was all about the music and the experience, man!
In 2017, I found myself missing shows that were less than twenty minutes from my house for myriad lame excuses ranging from trying to conserve my energy to falling into a food coma.
Here are my top seven shows that I missed out on seeing in 2017 because of lame excuses.
Check them out while I go and rethink some of my life choices…
7. Deer Tick & Friends -- Newport Blues Café (Newport, RI) -- July 30th
I was lucky enough to score one ticket to the last night of Deer Tick's Newport Folk Fest after-party shows. These annual gigs are legendary for the intimate setting, raucous party vibes, offbeat song selections, cover tunes, and guests galore. The plan was to hit the last day of Newport Folk Fest and then the afterparty. That morning, I started dreading the mere four hour drive. I emailed the ticket to a friend and watched the webcast that night on my phone.
Billy Bragg, Elvis Perkin,s and Nicole Atkins were special guests. They covered the Beatles, Dylan, Led zeppelin, the Stooges, and Leadbelly and ran through most of the yet to be released albums. Holy shite!
Yeah, sure. It was cool to watch on a 4.7inch screen, but I coulda been there, man! I shoulda been there!
6. Nicole Atkins & Low Cut Connie -- The Wonder Bar (Asbury Park, NJ) -- Nov. 25th
Yes, I am aware I cannot possibly make it to every show that I want to go to; but I at least pride myself on knowing what's going on and knowing what I am missing out on (Ya know. So I can make a year-end list about it). Somehow, I completely missed out on this show. I either completely forgot about it or it just slipped under my radar. Nicole Atkins and Low Cut Connie both put out stellar releases this year, and seeing them tear the house down in Asbury Park would have been pretty sweet...
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| Low Cut Connie |
Pretty sweet indeed, had I only known about it. I knew nothing about the show until I saw CoolDad post some shots online from the show. Man, I am really slipping in my old age. [CoolDad Note: I almost bailed on this one because of back pain. It was freaking fantastic, Matt!]
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| Nicole Atkins |
5. Kurt Vile & Courtney Barnett -- Loews Theater (Jersey City, NJ) -- Nov. 6th
This pairing piqued my curiosity from the moment I heard the announcement that Vile and Barnett would be collaborating on an album followed by a supporting tour.
Then I heard the record.
Lotta Sea Lice left me feeling disappointed (I even wrote an unpublished review, to which CoolDad famously commented, "If posted, this would be, by far, the most negative thing ever put up on the site"… hahah score!). [CoolDad Note: It did call the album "pedestrian at best," which was pretty damn clever.]
I am fan of Vile and Barnett separately, and Lotta Sea Lice definitely showed some signs of life. I had hopes that the live performances would flesh out the tracks and would showcase some of the chemistry that did not come through on the record. But, alas, I would not come to find out. The day of the show found me with perhaps the lamest excuse of all time. I was off from work and immersed in the world of Assassin’s Creed Black Flag for Playstation 4. A game that was at least three years old at this point; but, hey, it was new to me.
I was still iffy about Vile & Barnett after a few more listens to Lotta Sea Lice, but the show was only a few mins away from me, perhaps I should take the chance.
I decided to take to Facebook to help with my decision-making. Maybe I would get some newfound motivation. Maybe someone would want to go. I got one response. It basically said, “meh.” And that was all it took. I was that easily influenced. I sat back on the couch and continued nerding out.
4. Joe Fletcher -- Transparent Clinch Gallery (Asbury Park, NJ) , Tenth Ave Burrito (Belmar,NJ) -- Nov 18th, Rockwood Music Hall (NYC) -- Nov 22nd
Dude! Bro!
I missed out on seeing one of the greatest songwriters of our generation three times in one weekend! I was hosting Freaksgiving Fuzzfest at the AP Brewery on 11/18, so I knew there would be no chance of checking out the gig at 10th Ave Burrito show… I was bummed; but, hey, obligations are obligations, amirite?
But I had an idea. Maybe, just maybe, I could see Joe Fletcher perform that day anyway. I told Joe about the Supro Showcase going down earlier that day at the Transparent Clinch gallery. He sounded psyched to check it out. I ran into Danny Clinch that same afternoon, we chatted briefly and he said, "I love Joe Fletcher. If he comes, tell him to bring his guitar."
It was all happening!
Giddy with anticipation, I went for a stroll down to the boardwalk to have a beer with my buds. One beer turned into three or four, ok maybe seven; and, by the time I made the two block trek back to the gallery, I missed Mr. Fletcher doing a surprise opening set at the gallery. Grrrr!
Ah, that’s ok, I thought. I will check out his show just a few nights later in NYC.
But… his set was scheduled for midnight; and, unfortunately for me, no trains were running back to my area after 1230am. I could have driven. I could have taken Uber; but, instead, I cursed public transportation. Now that’s lame.
3. Daniel Johnston -- Town Hall (NYC) -- Oct 17th
Daniel Johnston’s brother / manager promoted this tour to be Daniel's farewell tour. But was that the truth? Was it an ominous prediction? Or was it just a marketing ploy?
At the beginning of the tour, Daniel made a statement during an interview that he did not see a reason to stop performing after this. But this was Daniel Johnston; and, given his struggles with mental health issues and recent physical health issues, there was a big possibility this could be his last rodeo. Just a few months earlier Johnston had cancelled a well-publicized gig at Asbury Park Film Fest that would have him backed by an all-star band, so I had mixed feelings about this "farewell tour."
Sure, I had a lot of anticipation; but it also seemed like a countdown to more show cancellations.
Tour started; and, miraculously, shows were not being cancelled. Sure, some gigs were cut short and others were disjointed and erratic. But that's Daniel Johnston. That is live music without a net. That is rock n roll.
So I should probably go check him out in NYC, right?!
Wrong. I spent that afternoon having some sweet backyard hangs with friends and then encountered some traffic on the way home. While sitting in the sea of brake-lights, I thought about how Eagles of Death Metal and The Battery Electric would be tearing up Asbury Park the next night. Perhaps I should just go home and save my energy for that one.
Save my energy? What? I’m 39 not 99. What was happening to me?!
I used the lame excuse of having two concerts in one weekend as my justification for miss out on seeing a show that I had been waiting for. Surely, that is something I would never find myself doing again.
2a. Drive By Truckers -- White Eagle Music Hall (Jersey City, NJ) -- Oct 5th
DBT playing just minutes from my house?! It was just a short and inexpensive uber ride away. It sounded like a blast!
Oh shite! As fate would have it… it was also the same date that The Yawpers were coming to the Saint. The Yawpers had just put out the amazing record, Boy in a Well, and they don't come through this area all that often… so the win went to The Yawpers… I was ok with that decision as the Yawpers killed it!
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| The Yawpers |
And, besides, Patterson Hood of the Truckers would be playing in NYC just a few weeks later and I wouldn’t miss that show… or would I?
2b. Patterson Hood -- Rockwood Music Hall (NYC) -- Dec 1st
I have long been a fan of Drive By Truckers and have had the pleasure of seeing them on many occasions… just not the occasion when they played Jersey City in October.
DBT always slay, but I had never caught Patterson solo. His first solo record, Killers and Stars, has been one of my favorite albums since its release, so I couldn't miss the chance to finally see and hear live versions of "Uncle Disney" and "The Assassin" as well as some stripped down DBT classics and rarities. I grabbed one ticket as soon as they went on sale.
The fateful day arrived, and the first excuses started creeping into my head… I probably should have gotten two tickets, right? I didn't really feel like going solo.
The show was sold-out and Patterson Hood was slated to go on early. Excuse two started to form when I wound up working a bit later than usual, and I questioned if would I make it in time to catch him.
Then lame excuse number three and self-sabotage set in. I grabbed a beer after work, and got comfortable at the pub and started thinking about how I was going to go into NYC early the next day and as there was a lot of pregaming to do before seeing the Deer Tick show at Brooklyn Steel. Maybe I should just go home, skip Patterson Hood, and save it all for the Deer Tick show instead.
So I did.
I did it again…
I used having two concerts in one weekend as my lame excuse to miss out on seeing a show I had been waiting for. Again.
Who am I? What have I become?!
1. Tom Petty -- NJPAC (Newark, NJ) -- June 16th
Tom Petty was playing just minutes away from my home! Tom. Petty.
Sure. I had seen him a bunch of times before, but that should have been even more motivation to go since he ALWAYS put on a killer show. Petty's Wildflowers album has been one of the most influential records throughout my entire life, and he had been playing a bunch of tunes from that album during the course of this 40th Anniversary tour.
I should have rounded up a crew. I should have made the twenty minute commute to NJPAC. I should have gone. I should have had a great night, and I should have sang along to every song.
Instead, I went out and got a burrito from Tito's Burritos, came home, stuffed my face, and then fell asleep sitting up on the couch watching TV.
Tom Petty died just a few months later at the conclusion of the tour.
I ate a giant burrito and dozed off instead of going to see Tom Petty's final area performance ever.
I have to live with that. I am sad and ashamed of myself.
It was a really good burrito though.
Happy New Year folks. Here's to not missing any "must see" shows in 2018… or at least making sure there’s darn good excuse for it!!
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